New Year New You, that's the words that come out of everybodys mouth in January. A positive mantra that helps you on your journey to whatever you want to be. I quite like it as it's so positive, I take it as it is, forget about the past and look on into the future.
In April 2012 I started my weightloss journey which both made me nervous and excited all at the same time. I did a lot of blog posts at the time so you can check them out here! I joined Slimming World I was nervous because I'd tried weightloss groups before and some I have to say didn't quite work in my favour after a couple of months I'd lose a bit of weight and to my despair but it back on instantly so not going to lie I'd quit. Something was different when I started Slimming World I had a big burning desire to succeed this time and I did. In a little over a year I lost eight stone it wasn't easy as I changed my diet and opted for the Paleo diet which really limits you in what you eat. Kind of bad when you meet your friends for dinner, just saying! It was the first time I could comfortably fit into the clothes that all my life I wanted to be wearing pretty Taylor Swiftesque dresses that fit beautifully and I was happy.
Fast forward to 2014 and things started to slide and I just wasn't feeling myself. I signed up to run the Mini Marathon with the paper which I thought was a good idea at the time and for months the training completely drained me. On the day of the actual Mini Marathon a family member who was super close to me like a second Mother passed away and it really broke my heart big time and still not a day goes by that I don't think of her and her witty humour. I did the Marathon in a bit over an hour I met my ex boyfriend at the finish but I have to say I wasn't feeling at all the best mentally or physically. A week later it happened when I least it expected it, I broke down completely.
The next couple of weeks were a complete and utter blur. I went to see a doctor and explained my symptoms which is kinda difficult to explain when it's going on inside your own head. A week later I was admitted to one of the best mental health hospitals in the country where I stayed for a while. At first it scared me as it was like nothing I ever experienced before being confined in a place with other people. Slowly but surely I came around and made a lot of friends which I'll probably have for life by the looks of things. It's still great to have that support on days that I'm feeling down. After a few appointments the doctors diagnosed me with an anxiety disorder and depression and put me on a course of medication which I'm glad to say worked and I don't have to take them any more. If anyone is reading this and going through stuff like this themselves just know that it's ok to get help, you're special and so important to people around you. I know I didn't realise at the time but you really are, life is precious and you don't get a second chance at things. Medication, sometimes long term can be a great help to you in the long run. Also remember, you are not illness and never will be. Your diagnosis doesn't label you and all your good friends will still recognise you as the fun, strong and outgoing person that you always were. They will be blown away by your inner strength which you probably thought you never had but you definitely do.
Now thankfully I'm more positive than ever and I know I'm going to succeed. I'll definitely keep you guys and dolls posted on my progress. Of course if you ever have any questions feel free to contact me on my email which is firstname.lastname@example.org I'll be happy to help in any way I possibly can.